Saturday, June 29, 2013

Motive and Opportunity

As the 72 people who follow this blog may or may not have noticed, I haven't posted a new entry since last August.

When someone hasn't updated their blog for a while, they usually start with a post announcing they're still around.  I didn't want to do that.  I've mentioned previously that my experience as a crossdresser seems to be so typical, I sometimes feel like I'm a bit of a cliche.  I didn't want to act like one again in a totally expected way.  However, the longer I went without posting, the more I thought it would be difficult not to acknowledge it.

So, I'm still around.

Like committing a crime, two important aspects to maintaining a blog entry are motive and opportunity.   When I've had something I wanted to write, I didn't have the time;  when I had time, I didn't feel like writing something.

Not much has changed.  I'm married to an amazing wonderful woman who hates that I want to express myself as Linda and that I'd love to be with other people like myself occasionally.  I haven't been out in forever.  I miss seeing other girls.

I still struggle with getting older.  The guy side of me doesn't mind too much (except for the usual middle age aches and pains), but my vision of myself as a woman is as someone who's young, beautiful and stylish.  Not that I could ever really pull that off, but the best I can do these days is heavy set, slightly dowdy grandmother. I still enjoy dressing but I would love to be able to see someone prettier when I look in the mirror.

Despite my not posting, I've been following other blogs.  I read Stana's and Meg's blogs every day.  There are others I enjoy, too.  I also want to mention how much I enjoy the comments that Pat Scalesman leaves on others' sites.  Although Pat has never felt the need to create blog entries, Pat's comments are always well written, wise and kind (and often funny).

So now that I've gotten the"I'm back" post out of the way, I may go back to posting the occasional update.   I like having a place for my random thoughts and I appreciate it when a reader acknowledges something I've written and adds a comment.